It will not be easy

Never be hurt any longer my dear
For I am hurt on your behalf
From now on, I will teach myself that I never loved you
I will teach myself that you never loved me
And possibly also that you are just my blood sister
Worth my smile, my favor, agape affiliation and nothing more

I believe what you say is from God
The same God who is also my father
He will never let me cry hour after hour and year after year
Even if I sinned against him in the first place
I know he will wipe my cheeks and return the old smile back on my face

In one corner of this world, I will find love again
Which might not reach the level that I thought I have in you
But I trust it will be nearer, I will learn to be content with it
For I have no power against your will
And no power against circumstances

I swallow my pride today, and admit failure for now
But invest in the hope that life has a second chapter
I look up in despair and wait for the Lord’s hand to wipe my tears
Just as he has done in my thorn filled past

I know it will not be easy to let you go
It will be as tough as that maths lesson
But still reality has to be faced

I do not think you should cry now
After all you saw it fit to destroy my shade in the first place
Never fill pity for me
For compassion never works in place of love

I am convinced; I cannot sow any better seed of love in you
Neither can I nurse the one that had rooted in me
I better let it die, oh, yes I see it go pale, loosing that bloom, that I so much adored
Yet I know it will not be easy for both me and you

By Dydimus Zengenene
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